Breathe for me
by KrisProngs
Summary: Kim always thought that her life wasn't complicated…until now. What would you do if: you're not the only daddy’s dearest anymore, your best friend asked you to practice sex and a boy you had a crush on started stalking you? Kim/Jared story, M for a reason
1. Which is about Saturday

**AN: Everything belongs to Steph Meyer, haha, like you wouldn't know!**

**Hi everyone, jeez, my first author's note in English on this page **** This is a huge day for me, because this story is my first story written in English! Well, I hope you guys would like my story; it would be hopefully a little different from others because I can finally write about my crazy thoughts and ideas, which is amazing lol. So enjoy!**

**Big big massive thanks belongs to my beta Mercury-Serenity **** she was fighting with my grammar and helped me a lot, you're gorgeous!**

**Xxx**

**1. Which is about Saturday?**

I love Saturdays. It is my day; the day where I can sleep until noon and stayed in pyjamas all day, without receiving dirty looks from mom. I didn't have a care about anything, because it was _Saturday _and my mind could finally take a break. I had no homework, no need to clean my room, no hovering around the house cleaning and definitely not worrying about the usual problems that a seventeen year old like myself would have. Nope, that's why I had Sunday for; Saturdays were for me.

Nobody was supposed to bother me with their problems. Everyone who knew me really well- and there was a few people- learned to respect my Saturdays; except of course, my mom.

"Kimmy! Are you awake?" Mom screamed from downstairs. Her voice was stern and annoying, like every Saturday morning that she ran late to go to Port Angeles Community College for her Marketing course.

_Thanks, mom, I'm awake now_. "Kim! I need your help, so get your lazy ass off the bed and come here!"

I groaned, refusing to leave the warm covers of my bed at 8 am. Mom was an adult; she should know how to deal with her problems and not burden her only child with them.

I didn't think that I was a bad daughter, because I wanted to have the privilege of sleeping until ten on a Saturday morning. It was only for one bloody day of the week. Actually, I was pretty sure that I deserved my sleep after spending the whole week working hard to keep my good grades, helping with the school newspaper, working in my Mom's café and baby-sitting every Wednesday's night and from time to time on Sunday afternoon at the Shaw's house.

"Kimberly!" Well, it looked like my own mother didn't agree with me. What a surprise.

"What?!" I yelled in frustration, leaving my favourite place in the world and went to see what her problem was. I hated when my Saturday started off like this.

My mom was pacing around kitchen, completely dressed in a navy shirt, a black pencil skirt and black heels. Her short brown hair was pulled into a messy bun and her still youthful face had no makeup.

She sighed with relief when she saw me. "Finally, you sleepy head! Have you seen my fucking keys? Because I can't find them and I'm bloody late!"

I rolled my eyes, but was careful that mom didn't see it. "Relax, mom. Did you look for them in your coat's pocket?"

"Huh, I did not," she frowned and went to her room to find her coat. After a minute, I heard her footsteps on the stairs and from the look on her face when she came into the kitchen; I knew that I was right. Like always. She smiled at me, grabbed her bag and some books, and kissed me on the cheek before she left. "You're the best! Love you."

"Tell me something I haven't already known," I chuckled blowing her kiss. "Love you too!"

When she left I couldn't go back to sleep, so I prepared me a small breakfast; French toast and black coffee and went to sit on the sofa in our small living room and watched TV for a while.

School had started a few weeks ago, after a long and lovely holiday. Unfortunately, I was back in my well-used routine of going to class.

I spent half of my summer holiday with my mom, hanging around with my friends Holly or Embry. I also worked for my mom and babysat for my aunt Sherrie or Kaye Shaw. I didn't do anything adventurous, but I was happy. I spent the first three weeks of August with my dad in San Francisco, where he gave me the "great news". He and his long-time girlfriend, Wendy, were getting married in December and that I should be their bridesmaid. Great, because I truly wanted to stand beside the woman that was gonna take my dad away from me. I couldn't wait to go home, I felt sick from their constant blissful life, when I felt so miserable and alone.

I hated that I couldn't see my father every day. I didn't get to feel his hugs and his goodnight kisses or see his face when I told him new joke that I'd learned from Embry.

It was pretty hard when your parents were lived two different lives and lived two states away from each other. I was always trying to be a good daughter and pretended that living this life didn't bother me.

My mom was sixteen when she met my dad in Port Angeles, where he's spending his summer holiday with his grandparents. He's a year older than her and he was something new for her, because he was that boy from San Francisco, which was cool. Anything that wasn't from La Push, Forks or Port Angeles was cool for my mom. They fell in love and spent every day together. Mom once told me that she thought he was her prince who would save her from this god-forsaken place and take her away.

This never happened.

He had to leave back home at the end of the summer, but he'd promised that he would stay in touch with her and when they were older, he would marry her.

Mom's heart was broken, because of his departure, but she believed that one day they would be together again living in a place far away from La Push.

Their phone calls got shorter and shorter with every passing day and she soon realized that maybe he wasn't the one for her. They broke up after a long amicable conversation; agreeing to be friends instead of lovers, because their lives were complicated even without having a long-distance relationship.

After six weeks of breaking up with my dad, mom found out that she was pregnant. Her whole world came crashing down and when she told the news to my dad he was devastated. She knew that if she had a baby she would have to give up her dreams of finally leaving the reservation and of seeing the world.

But she wanted me, even though, my dad was not happy about that. Both of my grandparents were furious and people from reservation didn't agree with my mom's decision. So I was born on 24 April 1989.

I've lived in La push my entire life, except when I spend the summers and some weekends in San Francisco. Mom and I are a great team: the best of friends and best roommates. She was still acts like a teenager and a parent at the same time. We lived in small house at the end of reservation; which belonged to my grandparents, but after they moved to Texas, they left it to us.

Mom owns a coffee shop in Forks with her friend Amanda, where I've been working since I was twelve years old, and help out as a waitress. Anyone would think that I, a teenage girl, would rather spend her time with her girlfriends, chatting about boys and gossiping about who slept with whom, but that was not my case. I love working with mom and Amanda, making fun of silly little things and spending my afternoons in the warm friendly atmosphere of the cafe shop.

I enjoyed my conversations with Harry Clearwater about fishing or cooking, laughing with mom on Amanda's jokes or the visits from my best friend Holly, when she just sat at the bar sipping on her cappuccino and smiled at me as she talked about her goals and dreams.

Embry would often call over with his buddies Jacob Black and Quil Ateara, high-fived me while trying to steal the cupcakes from basket. He could never get them, because I'd fast reflexes. He would grimace and tell that "next time" and I would laugh at him.

I was watching an old episode of 'Friends' when my cell phone rang. I ran upstairs to get it, but couldn't find the damn thing even when I heard the stupid ring tone playing _Hungry Like the Wolf_ from Duran Duran. It took me several minutes to find it on my bed; I looked at the caller ID and saw the missed calls from Holly. I pressed the button to call her back.

She picked her phone after the second ring. "Well, hello, I started to get worried that you were still sleeping."

I looked over at the clock; it was only 10:45 am. I would've loved to be sleeping right now, but thanks to Heather, I could not.

"No way!" I complained. "Mom had her 'I-don't-know-where-my-head-is' kind of day, so you can figure the rest out," I rolled my eyes even though I knew that she couldn't see me.

I heard her laughing on the other line of phone. "That sounds like Heather. Oh, my poor girl, you didn't get your beauty sleep and now you can't charm your prince J!"

"Oh, please, Holly, don't even start with that bullshit." I snapped. I wasn't in the mood to talk about Jared.

"Okay, okay! Anyway, I was calling you about this afternoon. Do ya have any plans?"

It was Saturday; of course I had no plans. "Nope,"

"Great! I want to go to Second Beach and take some photos. Wanna join me?" she said hopeful.

I smiled; photography was our passion and also a thing that brought us together. I lived in La Push, Holly in Forks; we didn't know each other before we took a photography course three years ago and become best friends. We dreamed about opening our own studio in Port Angeles, because the one here was pretty rundown and bad. We've been saving money for a very long time now and hopefully after our high school graduation, we'll be able to work in a photography studio. We even chose a place where we wanted to work. Mom was trying to talk me into going to College, but I didn't see a point in that, because I'd made my decision of what my profession was going to be. I didn't want to waste my money and time on something that I didn't need.

"Sure, it would be fun, but what about Rob? I thought you two were spending every single moment together," I commented with hint of blame in my words.

"Don't worry I'm all yours." She giggled. She was probably thinking about her annoying boyfriend. "Rob went hiking with his brothers this weekend, so you we can even eat me if you want!"

"Yummy," I chuckled. "I'll bring my favourite fork and vanilla topping," I laughed goofily. It was always like that with Holly, she was my light when I was in darkness. "What time do you want to go?"

"In an hour if it's okay. I'll pick you up. I was thinking that I can spend the night over at your house. We haven't had a cheesy-girl's night in ages! What do ya think?"

"Yeah, it's about bloody time, Scott!" I squealed excitedly. Ever since she started dating Rob, getting together and having sleepovers was difficult to plan. That stupid Rob was an employee of the only gas station in Forks. He was good looking, heck, hotter than hell, but meaner than Paul Gray.

"Okay, see ya in while!"

Well, that's it. I'd made plans, so the only thing I needed to do was find my camera.

Xx

After a long day of walking in the woods and enjoying the beach, we were too lazy to cook some actual food, so we ordered salami pizza and found some ice-cream in the freezer. Mom was out on a date with a guy from her Marketing class and I was self-loathing myself. How pathetic it's that my own mother could get a date, with a real guy on a Saturday night and I was sitting in my living room wearing sweatpants and eating junk food? I was the newest Fucking Bridget Jones. But at least, I had Holly. She was sorting through our DVD section trying to find something worthy of watching.

"Singing something of Travolta or Charming Gere?" She asked, grinning. She knew my answer even before I had a chance to speak. "Of course, _Grease_!"

I grimaced at her, my arms crossed over my chest. My poor chest. "What if I want Richie?"

Holly sneered, shaking her head in disapproval. "Impossible, you're such a big looser for Johny's shaking ass."

"You got me, I'm guilty!" I said, rolling my eyes at her and sticking out my tongue at her. "But next time, you should at least wait for my answer after you ask me a question, ok?"

Holly winked at me, fighting with DVD player. That thing was old as our house; it started to give us trouble. I tried to persuade mom on buying a new one, but she said that as long as it was working, there was no need to buy a new one. I was thinking of 'accidentally' throwing it out of window.

"Damn thing," Holly cursed and sat in front of the TV. "What's wrong with this thing?"

"It probably retired," I said jokingly. "That poor thing has served us well. It's getting old."

Holly ignored me and continued to play with the contraption, until she miraculously and after five minutes of cursing like a sailor, made the old DVD player work. She looked back at me and offered me a haughty smile, and leaned against the sofa.

"So," she paused. "You never told me about that J-guy today," she smirked at me. Her light brown hair was in a messy bun and her eyes stared at me playfully. "Do you guys have any classes together, like you did last year? Is he still a hottie? Do you guys talk?"

I sighed; I wasn't in the mood talking about him. Jared.

My story was your typical high school case. There was a cute boy named Jared Shaw, not the most popular kid at school, but not a looser, either. He was a sweet guy. This year we were both seniors in high school and we shared some classes the last few years, but we were never friends. We didn't really talk to each other, either. We only exchanged polite conversations, like "Can I borrow a pen?" and that was it.

I like him a lot, but probably he's any idea of how I feel about him, because his entire world was his girlfriend Lana. They were always together; sometimes I would wonder if they follow each other to the toilet. They started dating when they were 15 years old and only had eyes only for each other since then. Everyone in the school predicted they would get married right after graduation.

I never had a chance against the ever-smiling Lana. She was nice and so kind. There was nothing wrong with the girl. She was perfect and I was not.

I wasn't the most popular girl in school, because I was constantly categorized as the daughter of that 'sixteen years old that got knocked up'. My mother was still unmarried and that was a social crime in the reservation. Also the fact that I was constantly hanging around with a much younger crowd didn't help at all. I didn't have many friends, I guess that I could consider some of those people acquaintances, because they didn't really know the real me. The popular kids at school didn't talk to me because most of them were judging me for things I wasn't able to fix; like the fact that I was timid or that my mother wasn't married when I was born. I hated when people started talking about my mom, like she was a whore or something, when this kind of situation could easily happen to anyone.

Jared was a smart guy, who had the ease to talk to anyone about anything. He was a charming and every teacher adored him, even though he hated so much attention. Well, I knew that he hated it; he's always looking uncomfortable when the teachers were praising him about his last essay or his perfect exam scores.

He was my project. I loved to watch him whenever I got a chance. I wanted to learn learning every small detail about him and put the jigsaw puzzle that was Jared Shaw together. He was fascinating, but he was not mine.

"Jared wasn't at the school all week and I haven't seen him since July," I shrugged. I was a little worried; I knew something was going on because I did babysit his younger sister last year and during the first weeks of summer, before I went to visit my dad. But when I came back home and called Kaye to let her know that I was back on the Rez, she told me that she didn't need my services anymore. They were sick or something like that and it wouldn't appropriate for me to be in their house. This happened three weeks now.

She looked disappointed for a second before she smiled dreamingly. "Maybe Lana broke up with him and he is now heartbroken and when he comes to school again, he'll see you and he'll fall madly in love with you!"

Oh, yeah right. Holly ate something with excessive sugar for her body, which definitely affected her working brain.

"Like that would ever happen, babes." I had no hope when it came to Jared.

"Just try to be optimistic for a second, okay? You can dream, girl!"

But I knew that if I ever dreamed of Jared falling for me, it would hurt more in the end. I sighed when my phone beeped; I opened it finding a message from my other best friend.

_Wanna give me a ride on Monday? Too lazy to walk and u love my amazing company. I'll be waiting for ya. Ha ha ha; see I know u'll say yes. Hope u have a boring weekend, mine sucks. Hate Seattle. Miss ur ugly face. Btw, I have some interesting news, baby doll. Don't have dirty dreams about my sexy ass again, try my fab chest. ;P_

_xxEm sexy bear_

I was laughing so hard when I finished reading the text message. Holly just stared at me, annoyed. Seriously, he's one of my favourite men in the world, even though he's such a pain in the ass sometimes.

"Who's that from?" Holly asked curiously, as she sat next to me on sofa, trying to find out what was so funny.

"Em,"

I watched as she rolled her big eyes. "No surprise here, I should know. Where is your Emly today, anyway?"

"_Embry_," I corrected her for the hundredth time. "He's over at his grandparent's house in Seattle this weekend at a birthday party, I think." I shrugged.

I hurriedly text him back, my cheeks still hurting from laughing.

_Of course, teddy bear, but it wouldn't be for free. Wanna my fav lollipop and hot news from my own Gossip queen. Btw, your ass is not sexy at all; more likely fat, u should rethink starting to walk again. Can't wait see ur fat ass again, baby bear. Have better ass in my dreams like yours fat one lol._

_xxKim hot bunny_

I got a response in a few seconds.

_Screw you, sweetheart. xxEm with NOT fat ass_.

My sweet boy, he well knew that he had a very nice-shaped ass, but I couldn't stop myself from some teasing him. He was very sensitive about his body.

_Love ya too Big Fatty. xxKim with a knowing grin_.

I closed my phone and looked at Holly, who was watching me with a combined expression of interest and annoyance. "So," she said, trying to sound nonchalant. "What did he want?"

"A ride to school on Monday," I answered, grabbing the last slice of pizza. "The kid is too lazy to walk and thinks that I'm his personal chauffer." Not that I minded.

"Seriously, I can't understand what you see in him." I thought she was a little jealous of Embry because we had a strong bond; I could not imagine my life without him. We saw each other every day during school, after school and usually during dinners. We were sort of like twins.

"You don't even know him, you never met him, Hol," I defended my boy like a mother-bear defends her cubs.

"And I have no intentions in meeting him," she chuckled. "One crazy person is enough for me to handle."

I nudged her with my arm and grinned. "Poor Holly is scared to meet the love of her life!" I teased her.

She froze for second; her mouth opened wide, her bangs covering her eyes, when she started laughing loudly. "Bad one, Kim. That was definitely a bad one."

I was laughing at my own joke, which I often did, thinking about the possibility of Holly and Embry getting together. Imagining those two was hilarious. Holly and Embry had nothing in common, except of me. He was too cocky for her and she was too matured for him. But I would rather see her in a crazy relationship with my baby boy than with that possessive Rob.

We finally turned on the movie; comfortably situated on my red sofa, geared up to enjoy Johny's ass when I heard Holly's soft voice.

"_Stupid Embry_."

_**AN: Heh my second note! Kidding, just excited, Thank you for reading and please review if you like it or not ;)**_


	2. What is it about stupid boys?

**AN: Twillight saga and characters belong to S. Meyer, I don't own anything (except of my new shoes ;))**

**Hi guys, so there is a new chapter! You can finally meet amazing Embry Call who I adore and love very much. Thank you for reviews and everyone who read it and liked it. Thanks a lot to my beta Mercury-Serenity because without her you would be not able read this because of my problems with grammar (I'm not a native English speaker) **

**Xxx**

**2. What is it about stupid boys?**

I hate Mondays; something always goes wrong on Mondays. For example, last Monday, when I lost my wallet while having dinner with my mom, Amanda and Embry in Forks or that horrible Monday in August when dad told me about his engagement.

Today I overslept and was running late. I didn't have a chance to eat breakfast or take a morning shower. Stupid Mondays! Stupid alarm clock! Stupid Kim!

When I got out of the house, Embry was waiting for me in front of my car. Luckily, we lived next to each other, because I wouldn't have enough time to go pick him up and drive him to school every morning. His long hair was up in a ponytail; his melting smile was plastered on his tanned face, as he waved at me. I loved that boy so much!

We've known each other since forever. Our mothers were single parents and they found in each other a great support system and became best friends. That meant that Embry and I were growing up together. We spent every holiday together. We did everything under the sun together; family vacations, spring break, you name it!

He's been dubbed my unofficial brother; well, except for that time when we tried to find out how kissing worked. You know, I would never stick my tongue down my real brother's throat, right?

He was the first guy that I kissed. Embry was the first person that saw me get drunk. He was the first person I called when I found out about my father's fiancée. He heard me cry and console me through the phone, whispering that everything was going to be alright. He was the first guy that ever told Em that I was special. He was my haven! My rock to lean on.

"Morning, love!" Embry said, as he walked up to me and hugged me with such enthusiasm that I had to laugh. He pulled away from our hug and handed me the lollipop that he'd promised me.

"Morning to you too, baby boy!" I said happily and gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek. I had to get on my tiptoes to kiss him. The boy had grown a few inches more, making the task almost impossible. "What did you eat for breakfast? A growing porridge again?"

He was grinning when we got into my car. He sat in the passenger's seat and stared at his good looks in the rearview mirror. "How was your weekend, pumpkin?"

I peeled out of the driveway and headed towards our school, staring at the road ahead. "It's okay. I was with Hol. She stayed over last night. You know, we had a girl's night and watched some John Travolta and Olivia Newton. We ate some ice cream and pizza and wore some sweatpants! A well deserved girl's night!"

I saw him frowned. "Oh, your perfect Forks buddy Hobby?"

"_Holly_. Are you jealous or what?" I smirked at him. Why did they have this issues with each other's name was beyond my understanding.

"Oh please, nobody could be better than me." He said cockily. Oh boy, he was so jealous.

"Sure, baby." I chuckled at his immature behavior.

"Whatever; is she hot?" He said, raising a perfect eyebrow and stared at me questioningly. I always wanted to be able to do that.

I shrugged. "I suppose, why?"

"Is she a good kisser?"

"How should I know? I have never kissed her!"

"You should try it and I think I should be watching when you do it,"

"In your dreams, Embry Call!" I smirked at him.

"Well, definitely in my dreams, Kimmy." Embry said, winking at me. He'd a dreamy expression on his stupid face. How I wanted to punch him right there.

"You're a pervert, you disgusting brat."

"But you love me because of it." He grinned knowingly.

"God, I know that I'm stupid but I do," I mumbled, a small smile tugging at the corners of my lips. "So, what about my news?"

"You'll enjoy it, kitten." Embry winked at me. "Well, I heard from my well trusted sources that your Jared and his doll broke up last Friday. Apparently, she dumped him because he was cheating on her."

"What?!" I screamed not paying attention to the traffic. I almost didn't stop on the red light.

"Easy baby, don't kill us, okay?" Embry told me with calm voice as he rubbed my arm.

Oh my God, I can't believe it! Jared and Lana weren't Jared _and_ Lana anymore. Should I open a bottle of wine?

"Are you sure about that, Em? There is no way in the hell that he would cheat on her!"

"Well, apparently, he's not as innocent as he looks. He got himself in some serious shit over the summer. I heard that he was dealing drugs and started hanging with Sam Uley and our favorite friend Paul-the-jerk. Have you seen them?"

I shook my head. I heard some rumors about Sam Uley. He was a great guy before he disappeared four months ago, but when he came back everything changed. He broke up with his long-time girlfriend, Leah Clearwater and according to people, he started wandering through the reservation only wearing sweatpants in the middle of winter. Sam Uley became an enigma after that.

"Those dudes had to have taken a shitload of steroids to get so beefed up. They are like _huge_ and they walk around the Rez like they own it. Fuckers. Look, love, stay away from them and forget about your love toy, he is not good for you."

I frowned as I stared down the road,. Was that true? How could Jared, oh sweet and caring Jared, become so dangerous? I didn't want to believe it! It was impossible. But it did explain why Lana broke up with him.

No, no, no! I had to see what was going on first, before I started believing every stupid gossip that circulated through the entire Rez.

"Are you okay, honey?" Embry asked concernedly.

"Yeah, let's just change a theme. Let's talk about something else."

He nodded and smiled widely, showing off his white teeth. "I have an idea."

"Go on, sweetie."

"You know how we did everything "first" together, right?"

"Yeah," I nodded, my eyes never leaving the road. We were one street away from school and my favourite song was playing on the radio. "Like drinking, kissing, watching porn, stealing sweets…"

"Exactly!" I could tell he was excited. What was he up to? "So what about another "first"?"

"I don't think I get what you mean." I shook my head, a few hairs falling from my ponytail.

"Discovering other things together…" He was trying so hard to make me understand. Was I that slow? I had no fucking idea what he was talking about or what was going on in that head of his.

"Like what?"

He shifted impatiently in the seat and sighed annoyed. "Think, darling, what haven't we tried together?"

"Hmm, cliff-diving?" He closed his eyes probably thinking how stupid I was. Hey, he could just tell me! "Get arrested together? Tattoos?"

"No, no, no! Something more intimate." He was still trying, aw, how sweet of him.

_Intimate? What the hell?_ "Well, we bathed together when were kids. We slept in the same bed a million times, I don't know what…"

"Exactly!" He was glowing with pride that I finally found out. Unfortunately, I still did not understand what he meant.

"Hmm, do you want to sleep in my bed with me?" I asked him uncertain.

"That's it! _Sleep with you_." We just arrived at the crowded parking lot when it hit me.

"Oh-wait!" I almost crashed the blue Honda in front of me. "You mean like _sex_?"

He nodded. _Ah fucks_.

I parked my car like an amateur, taking deep breaths before I turned to face Embry with a scandalized look. "Are you seriously asking me to have sex with you, Embry Call?!"

He rolled his big eyes. "Don't be such a drama queen, Kimmy. I've seen you naked anyway."

"When I was six!"

"Touché."

He was acting like nothing happened; like it was totally a normal conversation between us and not the awkward sex talk. Oh Jesus, having the words _sex_ and _Embry_ in one sentence was awkward enough.

"Are you mental?" Seriously, I started thinking that he'd fallen and hurt his pretty head, or he was playing some dirty joke on me with Quil and Jake. Yeah, this sounded exactly like Quil's idea. I was going to kill them all.

Embry folded his big arms across his chest and leaned back in his seat. "Look, it's not a big deal so stop having a fit here, ok? The thing is that we're old enough for that kind of stuff and I would rather impress girls with my experience than my lack of it. I was hoped that you would like to help me."

If I had gun with me I would probably shoot his most sensitive place. I was getting really pissed as I watched the smug and confident expression on his face. _Hell, what an honour was to be asked to lose my virginity to Mr. Call!_

I exhaled slowly. "So, if I understand correctly," I started with my voice so sharp I surprised myself, "you want me to be your practice sex-doll, until you're great fucker and then you can go around like some sex god without any embarrassing situations?"

He nodded. _Oh, calm down Kim, breath in, breath out._

"Get out," I hissed, my hands slightly shaking.

"What, but Kim look at it from…" He had the courage to continue.

"GET OUT FROM MY CAR, IDIOT!" I yelled at him trying to push him out. "Do I look like some experimental rabbit, you dickhead?! God, get away from my sight or I swear I'll tear your cock from your body and feed the dogs with it!"

"Whoa, hey, calm down, woman!" I could tell that he was scared; he bloody should be! He got out of my car faster than I expected. He stared at me warily. "Are you PMSing or something?"

I let out frustrating scream, which caused him to run away like a scared puppy. I stayed in the car a little longer focusing on calming down. I looked at the mirror, only seeing my flushed face and wide eyes. I looked like a psycho. Hell, I felt like a psycho! That stupid shit that Embry said; I was still so angry. How did he dare to ask me such a thing and think that it's not a big deal? What was I? Some girl with the notice on her front door that read: _Wanna learn how to kiss or fuck? You are in the right place, please, come in_. _Kim is here to help you._

It was true, we experienced almost everything together, but sex and an innocent make-out session between two young teenagers was entirely different. I loved Em. I did, even though I often wondered why, but he was like my brother. I just couldn't think about him in that way because it felt _so_ wrong.

Besides, I always thought that my _first_ would be with someone I truly loved. I always thought that I would have sex because for the first time, because I was in love and wanted it and not because Embry Call wanted to practice.

I glanced quickly at my watch and saw that I was late for class. _Ah shit_._ I really hate Mondays._ I grabbed my things and got out from my red car and ran straight to school. The hall was almost empty as I reached it, hurrying to get into the class.

I hoped I wasn't in big trouble; I was never late before. I quickly knocked on the door when I finally found my homeroom and then came into the crowded room. Every pair of eyes was on me. God, I hated getting so much attention. I was not a girl who was used to being the center of attention. I felt beads of sweat forming on the back of neck. My cheeks were blushing and suddenly the room felt too warm.

I shot an apologetic smile at Mr. Clark. "I'm very sorry for my lateness, Mr. Clark. I had to sort out some problems and lost track of a time."

Mr. Clark was older than my granddad and had sharp features that made him look strict, but he had a soft spot for me. "It's okay, Kim, but I hope it won't happen again."

"No," I shook my head looking around classroom for an unoccupied table. "_Because I'll kill that jerk today_." I whispered harshly seeing that my usual spot was waiting for me unoccupied.

I was so drowning in my thoughts that I saw him as I slipped down next to him. My heart started beating faster because it was not only Jared, it was the new _whoa Jared_. He was back at school, looking hotter than a sinful angel. He was big, with enormous muscles that were visible through the fabric of his green t-shirt. His beautiful silky hair was gone, completely cut and he looked like man in his mid-late twenties and not an 18 years old boy.

He was watching me with an amusement, a light smirk playing on his gorgeous lips. I hurried to turn away before he would catch me staring at him like a drooling fool.

I was pulling out books and stuff for class from my bag when he leaned closer to me. "You had to have a really big problem with some guy when you're already planning on killing him." I heard his low laughter.

I froze for a second; there was no way he could've heard me, right?

I looked at him confused. "Pardon me?"

He was grinning down at me, showing his white teeth smile, which just lit up his face even more. His expression changed as soon after he met my eyes. He got all rigid, like he froze on the spot, but his eyes were full of life. He held my gaze, looking slightly overwhelmed by something I could not figure out. His face showed so many emotions at the same time – confusion, adoration, and fascination. It was similar to the expression that the girls that were always swarming him had, except that on his face was more captivating. Breathtaking. I felt there was something hidden behind his gaze, something that would change my life forever. I felt an odd pull in my stomach. It brought me closer to him! I felt the need to touch his face and get lost in his embrace.

Someone coughed and I was finally drawn back to reality. I quickly looked away, breaking our gaze and focusing on Mr. Clark. But I could still feel his gaze on me, which made me nervous and made me feel embarrassed. I had no clue what was going on in that head of his. Why was he acting like he saw me for the first time in his life? When did he get the right to stare at me like that?

"_Oh_." Jared let out a breath, shocked expression still on his face. "_Shit_."

My head snapped up, peeping over his tall figure. He looked perplexed, shaking his head like he wanted to wake up from a dream. But I saw something else in his dark eyes, they showed realization.

Well, at least Jared knew what the fuck was happening, because I was completely lost.

I frowned. I needed to stop thinking about this weird situation and start paying attention to what was going on in class. I opened my textbook ready to start taking notes, even though I could still feel Jared's eyes on me, staring. It left me slightly intrigued, when I heard his gasp.

I turned my head a little so I would be able to see Jared's face. I saw his eyes fixed on my textbook. I looked down feeling confused, when I rested my eyes on the opened pages, I finally understood.

My breath hitched in my chest and I felt all the blood rushing to my face. Oh, no! NO! NO! NO! Please, _no_. There, around the margins of the page, where I had taken notes on the last class, were words and pictures that Jared wasn't suppose to see!

_Jared+Kim_

_Mrs. Kim Shaw_

_I love Jared Shaw_

And fucking hearts circling around every silly statement. The good news was I did _not _write them. The bad news was that Jared did _not_ know that fact.

_Embry Call, you're so dead!_

**AN: Hey, guys! Hope you enjoyed this chapter, because I enjoyed writing it muhaha. I just love Embry **** Please Review and let me know if you like it or what are you thinking, it will totally help me and make my day better! Thanks.**


	3. Polar bears and a visitor

**AN: Everything belongs to Steph Meyer…**

**Hi everyone, first at all I need to apologize for hmm 4 moths of not updating? Well, I had a really busy life, I moved back from Ireland to Slovakia, where I've started my University and so much happened but I'll try to find time for writing and bring you more of Kim's craziness **** Thank you all for the support and your reviews, big hugs!**

**Big massive thanks belongs to my beta Mercury-Serenity for her amazing job and help, you are a star!**

**Xxx**

**Polar Bears and a Visitor**

It wasn't that bad. I mean, things could've turned out worst. For example, a massive asteroid could be heading to La Push or giant wolves eating children, right? I just had to act nonchalant; pretend that I had no idea of what was happening. Jared's scrutinizing stare didn't faltered, it pressed on throughout history class. He was probably trying to figure out what the psycho/stalking girl – hence, me – sitting next to him wanted. He was probably wondering why on earth I had written his name all over my notebook. I sighed irritated. I could sense that he would just avoid me from here on – because from now on, he would know me as the little stalker. And sure he would tell his friends about little weird me; the girl with a massive crush on him and they would seat around the coffee table laughing their pompous asses at me. I would be the entertaining topic of their conversations, but who cared?

It's not like I like him or anything. It's not like I want him; it's not like I had dreams about him. No, no, of course, no. I sighed again. It wasn't going to bother me when he laughs in my face and tells me how pathetic I truly was. It is not my fault that he might think of me this way; I blame my so called best friend. He was the idiotic, moronic jerk with the sick-strange sense of humor.

It truly had to be Monday. Monday is the vilest day of the week and this Monday proved to me once again why I hated them. As I said before, it was the worst Monday ever in the history of humankind and whose fault was it? Of course, that asshole Embry Call, now officially my so-not-best-friend. Leave it to Embry to ruin my joyful existence just by being himself. I could've easily gotten over his ridiculous suggestion about being his sex-buddy, but after what happened in history class, never. I am going to make sure that I come up with ways to torture him and give him a slow and painful death. Yes, it would upset his mom – who I adored unconditionally – but after his death, she was going to know that I actually did the world a big favor.

The moment the bell rang, announcing the end of history class, I dashed out of the room. I didn't want to spend another second under Jared's questioning gaze. I ran to my locker, which was on the far side of the building and retrieved my biology book. Thankfully, biology was the last class, and I could finally go home, away from all the craziness that seemed to follow me today. I entered the classroom, and sat impatiently in my seat. I was tired from stressing over the Jared incident and mentally strained from plotting Embry's death. I came up with ten different ways to torture and kill him; number four was my favorite. I could just picture polar bears eating him. All I had to do was find a polar bear in La Push, and that was impossible. But, one could dream of such things, right?

When the teacher entered the class, she went on about the how the body produces hormones and how they accelerate metabolic rates in the body and stupid stuff that to me, I will never use. I stared at the clock, doing a countdown until I was free to get the hell away from school. I was strategizing of getting out of the school building without crossing paths with Jared. I wanted to call my mum and bitch about what Embry had done. I also wanted to eat ice cream; it was a coping mechanism that really helped me with stressful situations. It'd been a strenuous day at school. I stared at the clock again, and saw that there were five minutes left of class. I then turned my attention to Mrs. Brown and noticed the red lipstick on her teeth.

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. I reached for my books and closed them, stacking them neatly, preparing myself to get out of this tedious class. Three more minutes until I could be free from the confinements of the room. I also wanted to get out from class, so I didn't have to be another minute near my perverted and very smelling lab partner, Cody Benner's destructive breath. He was constantly leaning over me, trying to peek at boobs; another pervert, just like Embry.

Ok, now two more minutes until I was in my car, listening to the harmonious tunes of the Spice Girls, in the safety and comfort of my car. I wanted to bid goodbye to this awful and long Monday.

One more minute until this feeling of claustrophobia and panic would cease. When the bell rang, I let out a slow breath. A smile crept to my lips, when the realization that class was over washed over me. Freedom! I grabbed my messenger bag and swiftly placed my books inside it. I put on my green hoodie and checked my phone as I left the classroom. There were five messages. I sauntered over my locker, while I read the text messages and sighed for the thousand times today.

_Hey, baby, r u calmed now? U acted like a freaky bitch. I don't know what got into u, it's not like I'm asking for ur life, just a small favor._

Stupid fucking asshole Call, does he think that my virginity is a small favor? I'd really hoped that he was reconsidering about what he asked me earlier; but apparently he didn't learn. If only there was a damn polar bear to eat him!

_Why were u not at lunch? R u avoiding me and my sexy ass? Don't be such a drama queen, kitten; that's Quil's role._

I rolled my eyes at the phone – ignoring the fact that I must've looked stupid doing so. I opened the last message from ass king, his messages made things worse.

_R u like ignoring me, doll? Don't be a pussy and talk to me! I don't bloody understand what women think?_

Oh, who would be the pussy when a polar bear ate his sorry ass? I was mentally beaten and it was only Monday.

_I just got into the trouble with Ms. Big Tits, because I didn't pay attention to her stupid babbling lecture and that's your fault! You're stressing me out, stop it and come to talk to me, baby._

I had to remember to buy something nice for Ms. Weasley; us women need to stick together against men's stupidity.

_I'm gonna tell ur mum that u went to Seattle with Hobby in May, when u were supposed to be with me and the boys. Think about it and come talk to me… U know that I'll do it, hon. I'm a bad ass! Oh yeah!_

Okay, what a sneaky cheating bastard! Seriously, I just wanted to cut his balls and feed them to the wolves. I took a few calming breaths and then left school, half expecting to see Embry waiting for me outside school, but I was wrong. Embry was standing on the other side from where I parked with Jake and Quil, looking really pissed. When he saw me, he frowned at me, expecting me to run to him begging for forgiveness. I laughed in my head and flipped him the middle finger.

_Here you go, love!_

I got into the car with smirk plastered on my face.

xxXxx

When I got home I felt relieved and finally calmed down; at least part of me calmed down. I turned the teakettle on as I pick up the phone and called a familiar number.

"Hi, honey," Mum's singing voice greeted me on the other side of the phone.

"Mum, I hate my life," I whined, pouting like the drama queen I was, because I knew that my mum was supposed to tolerate it.

"Well, welcome to the club, hon!" she said sarcastically. "What's wrong with my baby?"

"Do you know any assassins that I can hire?"

"I'm not going to let you hire a killer to murder yourself, Kim. I don't have too much money, honey. If I do that I could get in trouble because you would be dead and the police would blame me because I'm your mother."

"Jeez, thank you for caring so much," I replied smoothly. "But it's not for me; I need to take care of Embry."

My mum chuckled loudly. "What did that poor boy do to you this time?"

"You don't want to know, mum, believe me," I said solemnly, rolling my eyes, as I recalled Embry's stupid face. "What about polar bears, do you know where I can find one here in La Push?" My mother's only response was to laugh loudly. "Thanks, Mum. I'm glad I entertain you."

"Oh baby, I love the way that you are think!" she said contently.

"That's great but you're not helping me," I whined.

"Why don't you invite him for a walk and then push him off a cliff, sweetie?" Mum said, a playful tone in her voice.

That's why I loved my mother so fucking much. Actually, why didn't I think of that? It was so simple and it would so look like an accident, so I wouldn't go to jail!

"You're genius! I'm so proud of you!" I said excitedly to my mother.

"It was my pleasure to help you. Sweetie, try speaking to him first before you kill him, okay? He is a good kid and Amanda would be pissed, ya?"

"We'll see. Bye, mum, love you!"

"Love you too, darling," she chuckled again before she ended the call.

I chuckled as well; she always made my day better. I made tea and took out the ice cream out of the freezer, when the doorbell rang. I placed my tea and ice cream bowl on the table and sauntered over to the door. I crossed my fingers, hoping that it wasn't that stupid Embry that came to bother me; but I was so wrong.

The minute my hand touched the doorknob and opened the heavy door, I found myself staring at Jared Shaw; he was standing on my porch. His hands were tucked in his jeans' pockets, an uncertain smile displayed on his face. I stood across from him, utterly nervous, confused, and frozen, unable to move or speak or even breath. WTF?

"Hi," Jared greeted, his smile widening after seeing me or maybe I just imagined it.

If this would've been another time, then it would've been a different situation. I would've been very excited to have Jared-fuck-me Shaw standing at my porch. I would have been blushing and giggling and maybe even trying to flirt, but not now. I felt like someone put me under a stream of cold water. I _so_ knew what was going to happen and I mentally prepared myself for my moment of humiliation, because there was only one reason why Jared was at my door step. I shifted uncomfortably where I stood and stared attentively at him. He was frowning at me, obviously expecting me to say hello too, but I didn't want to prolong my misery or the moment of my mental breakdown, so I just closed my eyes and then opened them again, grimacing, as I waited for him to laugh in my face or make rude comments about me.

"Just let me have it, please," I said dejected, closing my eyes shut, as I waited for the words to come out of his lips. He didn't respond, so I sighed and clenched my fists. "Just do it and end my misery." I said despondently.

Jared coughed. "Do-do what? Are you alright?" he stuttered.

I opened one eye to see Jared watching me warily – confusion written all over his face. I bet he was considering if I had some medical condition or if I was just a crazy girl.

"Just get it over with, please. Laugh at me and tell me how pathetic I am. Tell me to my face that a girl like me doesn't have a chance with a guy like you."

His eyes widened, his perfect lips pursed into a thin line. Jared Shaw raked his fingers through his cropped hair and gasped loudly. "I'm not here to do any of that," He said shocked; pleading me with his chocolate eyes to believe him. I really wanted. I really did.

"So, why are you here then?" I asked quietly, blushing at the previous comments I'd made.

"I have something for you…"

Oh, there we go. So Embry the ass had been right. "Look, I'm sorry, but I'm not into that stuff. It's nice that you came over to talk to me, but my mum would kill me if she knew that I was buying drugs," I said breathlessly.

Jared stared at me like I had grown a pair of arms. He shouldn't have expected me to buy the drugs! Maybe he wanted to blackmail me, so if I don't buy the drugs he is going to tell everyone about my freaking obssessive nature and about the horrible accident that happened in history class. Shit, I was obviously cornered…

"_Whoa_, stop, Kim," Jared interrupted my thoughts, his steady voice caused my heart to dance in victory after hearing him speak my name. He knew my name! _God, I am pathetic_. "I'm _not_ a drug dealer."

"Are you sure? Because, um, well, like that's cool if you want to be one. Well, it really isn't, but then again, of course, that's your life… It's just you came to the wrong person…" I rambled on.

Jared let out a deep sigh, tilting his head up to the sky. "God, help me," he muttered, before he looked down at me again with a tired expression on his face. "Kim, I've never done drugs and I haven't thought about selling them, either, ok?"

"Not even weed?" I asked him doubtfully.

He smirked at me but I could see guilt written all over his face. "Well, that doesn't count. I'm a teenage boy and it was only once…"

"Okay, you don't have to explain yourself to me, Jared," I smiled at him; he was very cute when he was trying to defend himself. "Anyway, I got that you're not a drug dealer now, um, sorry for thinking that about you were. I've heard some rumors about you and was stupid enough to believe them… I'm really- are you okay?"

Jared had this goofy smile and dreamy expression in his eyes, as he stared down at me. "I like the way you're saying my name."

_Eh, where are the hidden cameras? _This had to be some kind of joke or his way of revenge. Probably, Quil was the master mind behind all of this. It was his way of making me suffer because I kicked his ass the last time we were together or maybe Jared smoked too much weed.

I offered him a small smile, "So, why are you here again? You told me that you brought me something-"

"Oh, sorry, I just let myself get carried- um, hold on a second," He said and started to search for something in his pockets. He beamed at me, when he finally found the mysterious item, he gave it to me. When I first saw the thing in his big hands I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"A pen?" I asked questioningly.

Jared looked very proud of himself for bringing me the blue pen. "You forgot it in the classroom earlier."

_Ugh, that cursed history class; he just had to bring it on!_ Rub it in my face, right? "Well, thanks. But you didn't have to come all the way to my house, just to give me the pen back, Jared."

He glazed his large hand over his hair as I stared at him closely. I started to think I had some serious weak spot for his hands; they made me feel weak on the knees.

"It's cool, your house is on my way home anyway, and so I thought that I would stop by and bring it to you." He was lying. I folded my arms across my chest and smiled at him. He gave me an uneasy smile, not knowing what to expect. I started laughing.

"What?" he asked softly; slightly confused.

"Seriously, do you do this often?" I asked, placing my arms on the side. He gave me a puzzled look and sighed. "Do you, like, I don't know, drive all the way to someone's house just to return their _pen_?"

"Well, only if that someone is a beautiful girl," he grinned down at me. My stomach churned nervously and a pleasantly warm feeling flowed inside me after hearing Jared call me beautiful. "And well, I thought it's a very important pen to you." I was blushed again, which caused his smile to widen.

"Well, thanks again; it's a very important pen indeed."

"I thought so," He winked at me.

I had an urgent problem here. If he didn't stop flirting so callously, I could jump his fine-ass right there.

"So, since you went through the trouble of returning my beloved pen, even though you live on the other side of reservation…"

Jared blushed, apparently shocked that I knew where he lived. "Well-"

"It's okay," I smiled again; it was the only thing I knew to do at the present time; smile like a fool. "So would you like to come inside for a cup of tea I just made some?"

Whoa, did just I invite Jared in to my house? _Gosh, he is going to reject your stupid invitation. I bet he has better thing to do other than drink tea with a weirdo like you_, I thought harshly.

"That would be great!" He almost shouted with excitement.

_What was going on?_

"Okay, come on in," I said confused, as I moved to the side and let him inside the foyer of my house. I followed after him and closed the door behind me. As I moved, I started wondering if this was truly a dream. It had to be. Mondays weren't so pleasant for me. "The kitchen is this way," I said, biting my bottom lip, as he stopped walking and allowed me to steer him towards the kitchen.

_Well_, I though contently, _maybe this Monday was not so bad after all._

We continued ambling towards the small kitchen – and I was still struggling with the idea that this was just a dream. I was certain that it was a dream, or was it not? And then my phone started ringing.


End file.
